Hello, n00bgrounds! Try as I might and even though it is filled with morons, I just can't get away from this site. So, in honor of SquiDay 2010 and because I'm too lazy to make an animation at all let alone for a long-dead spam group, I've taken the time to go through all of my old chat logs from 2008 and 2009 and pull some quotes from them. Sadly missing from this list because I couldn't be bothered to properly format them are the action sequence with r0ms that degraded into porno and that one time I convinced Jehosapha that I was a parisitoidophile.

SOCOM SQUAD, BITCH.
brunch masta r0ms says (7:01 PM):
so
brunch masta r0ms says (7:01 PM):
socom squad
BlackberrySocom says (7:01 PM):
what about it
brunch masta r0ms says (7:02 PM):
it's the socom squad.
BlackberrySocom says (7:02 PM):
THE socom squad?
brunch masta r0ms says (7:02 PM):
yes
BlackberrySocom says (7:02 PM):
holy shit dude
brunch masta r0ms says (7:03 PM):
i KNOW.

On the aquisition of socomsquids.net (JUL 2007 - JUL 2009), which wasn't used until the death of our InvisionFree forum that had swastikas plastered all over it.
FLAKBERRY says (2:12 PM):
i bought ss.net the next dayy
Slinky says (2:12 PM):
really? damn
FLAKBERRY says (2:12 PM):
yeah but we didn't use it until august
Slinky says (2:12 PM):
jeez what took so long
FLAKBERRY says (2:13 PM):
we were enjoying Socomlavia II
FLAKBERRY says (2:13 PM):
with all of its nazi propaganda
FLAKBERRY says (2:13 PM):
and nazi members
Slinky says (2:13 PM):
oh ye!
FLAKBERRY says (2:13 PM):
and nazi Clock overlords
Slinky says (2:14 PM):
lmao man
Slinky says (2:14 PM):
gooooood times

On SeveredThumb swapping out some animation about cats and toast and gravity that had been frontpaged with a Socom Flash
Slinky says (3:54 PM):
i doubt it
Slinky says (3:54 PM):
he'd just say you can't do it
FLAKBERRY says (3:54 PM):
HE'S WADE MAN HE'D FUCKIGN DO IT OK

After I had sent Splatter a really old FLA of Pineapple's
FLAKBERRY says (7:51 PM):
yeah i think that's from feb. 2007
Splatta says (7:51 PM):
that isnt so old
Splatta says (7:55 PM):
like
Splatta says (7:55 PM):
2005 is sort of old
Splatta says (7:55 PM):
2000 is sort of old
Splatta says (7:55 PM):
1999.9 is fucking ancient

on wiretaps
r0ms says (6:28 PM):
Eddie Davidson, 35, was serving a 21-month sentence for illegally sending spam over the Internet and escaped from a minimum security prison in Florence on July 20.
r0ms says (6:28 PM):
jesus christ, 21 months for SPAMMING?
FLAKBERRY says (6:28 PM):
email spam
EMAIL SPAM
r0ms says (6:28 PM):
Socom Squad: Now in the FBI's jurisdiction
r0ms says (6:28 PM):
yeah whatever
r0ms says (6:28 PM):
the same question applies
r0ms says (6:28 PM):
21 months for EMAIL SPAMMING?
r0ms says (6:28 PM):
holy shit serious business
FLAKBERRY says (6:28 PM):
srs bnis
FLAKBERRY says (6:28 PM):
wait
FLAKBERRY says (6:29 PM):
illegally sending spam
FLAKBERRY says (6:29 PM):
illegally sending
FLAKBERRY says (6:29 PM):
how the fuck

The in-joke here is that r0ms had previously mentioned to me an instance where a pizza him and his mom were making turned into fail and somehow ended up not only burnt, but also top-down on the kitchen floor.
LOLLERFAGSTEAK says (6:40 AM):
full of plotholes
r0ms says (6:40 AM):
i could write a story for you
r0ms says (6:40 AM):
but i'd have to know what you have so far
LOLLERFAGSTEAK says (6:40 AM):
i'd let you do it but everything you touch turns to "freakin rediculous" within two seconds
r0ms says (6:41 AM):
that's only true when i'm high on r0ms
LOLLERFAGSTEAK says (6:41 AM):
case in point: pizza
LOLLERFAGSTEAK says (6:41 AM):
lol
r0ms says (6:41 AM):
why don't you go lick a zzt asshole
r0ms says (6:41 AM):
i'm going to fucking travel all the way down to texas and cook you a fucking pizza
r0ms says (6:41 AM):
goddamn

From a conversation with CarrotSocom after I had changed everyone's names on the forum to Hiveminded Individual and their NG userIDs.
Hiveminded Individual 1326787 says (12:16 PM):
Conformity is salvation

One recurring fad on the SS forums was Pineapple and myself changing the display style of every usergroup to resemble that of the banned group, hence the term EVERYONE = BANNED.
Faucet Face says (2:42 PM):
Everyones banned what the fuck did we do now?
that cupcake guy says (2:42 PM):
YOUR EXISTENCE PISSES US OFF
Faucet Face says (2:43 PM):
us?
that cupcake guy says (2:43 PM):
well mostly r0ms
Faucet Face says (2:43 PM):
Oh
Faucet Face says (2:43 PM):
I thought you were using the Royal We
that cupcake guy says (2:43 PM):
YOU'RE BANNED SHUT UP

During a discussion with r0ms about creating an RTS with Age of Empires influence.
the lollercupcake who is a fagsteak says (12:56 AM):
THROW ROCKS THROUGH THE MATRIX

LOLFAT
Spl@tta says:
hey, you have an awesome voice by the way
Spl@tta says:
you dont sound like a fat computer geek at all
Spl@tta says:
i mean um
LollerPizza says:
thanks i made it myself
Spl@tta says:
<3
Spl@tta says:
man youre the coolest fat kid i now

Control the media, control the mind.
Spl@tta says:
i just had this thought
LollerPizza says:
thought is expressly forbidden among the ranks of socom administration

Christmas with Splatter
Splatter says:
yay people are awake
Splatter says:
yay time to open up the presents i didnt get
Splatter says:
in this one is a brand new laptop
Splatter says:
and in this one is everything i could possibly need to learn how to dj
Splatter says:
and in this one is a new MIDI keyboard
Splatter says:
and in this one is a gameboy original
Splatter says:
im happy
Splatter says:
i got everything i wanted
nutritious cupcake says:
lmao
nutritious cupcake says:
that's nothing man
i got a signed copy of the future
Splatter says:
damn
Splatter says:
lucky

Needless to say, the Socom Squad was a fun group with fun people and I have no regrets besides not banning Ian upon first sight and not banning Domino when he started attempting to out-postwhore Ian. Fuck you both, I hope you die in a r0ms-related accident. As for Carrot and Jeho, maybe get injured in a r0ms-related accident if it's convenient, I guess? I used to harbor genuine ire for you two but that's died down now that I have nothing to hate you for since the group is dead and whatnot.

For those of you who still don't get it, we did it because you, without fail, provided hilarious reactions. Stop getting mad about half-assed flash animations on the internet. I don't want your respect, I would have put effort into it if I cared to, it did NOT take nine people to create that, and I do it because it makes you mad. No, we will not stop forming groups and merge with the Clock Crew simply because they came before us. We are our own superior brand, and we will continue to annoy the piss out of you until it stops being funny to do so. What's not to understand about any of this?

Special thanks go out to the Bomb Brigade, Atom Association, Gear Group, Sun Mafia/Moon Squad, and all those other groups we feuded with back in the day. Regular thanks go out to everyone who took it upon themselves to leave a funny review or complain about us in a news post or on the BBS. You guys are all awesome, in a depressing sort of way.

Until next time,
bcux u gay lol!!1, goddamnit r0ms, and i hacked the ss sorry guys

The forums may be dead, but SS is 4LYFE and shall live on through its members.
Extreme PABbage, yo.

But seriously, this group sucks. We couldn't even finish 10 damn Chemo Trials.
what ups to: Splatter, dpeppa, Sev, Raspy, Newfie, and THE R0MS
-BLAX II RETURN OF BLAX